QUESTION:

Hi,

I was told that I was have the borderline personality disorder. I am twenty eight. I also have chronic depression. I know enough about depression that it runs in my family, and that they can’t care less about my mental Illness. They haven't understood me for years. I told my mother about the depression but not about the borderline personality because I know how she will react like she always does - over react.

I am currently seeing a therapist, and have been on many medications for the last two years. I also can't hold down a job for long either because of this disorder - which I never knew I had until now.

I found your book and been reading it off and on to learn a little about borderline personality.

I think I also have post traumatic stress disorder too since I was raped at an early age (13). I have been in the hospital about 5 or 6 times for suicidal thoughts. I also been reading about PMS and chemical imbalances which happen when I cry more often.

My question is: I want my life back. I am never happy and I have the empty mood a lot. What can I do?

ANSWER:

The first step is making all the diagnoses. I cannot overemphasize this. The screening test I use for my patients will be a great first step for you. The BPD medically is very straightforward to treat, which I describe briefly in this Newsletter and at length in my books.

Treating all the other diagnoses is crucial, and a necessary component for recovery. You are responsible for yourself and your future.

Retraining the brain is mandatory unless you want your current life to continue. This means reading books, listening to tapes, associating with positive people, having a comforting spiritual base, exercising, eating well, and doing affirmations. You’ll likely need to continue with therapy, and learn to challenge your bad memories and interpretations - while sometimes they may be correct, other times they’re not and you aren’t able to distinguish which ones are correct.

Once the mood swings, anger, emptiness, depression, rage, misinterpretation of motives, and fatigue are gone, you can concentrate on who you want to be. Try to remember: who you are and why you’ve become who you are is of minimal importance compared with who you want to be and how you’re going to get there.