Q. I am a compulsive liar who is unable to stop, regardless of consequences. Most of my lies are intended to manipulate either a lover, or someone who I feel a need to be close to. there seem to be no limits to what I will lie about. Again, most of these lies are out of a need to initiate concern. I have also self-mutilated to gain attention and threatened suicide in order to feel cared about. I am just curious, as well as deeply concerned about these problems and if they are indicative of borderline personality disorder. As I get older and realize that I have no real friends, I am becoming increasingly worried.
A. Most compulsive liars in my experience don't acknowledge to themselves or others that they are pathological liars. Dishonesty is usually a character problem, which is separate from the BPD. You may indeed have the BPD. Borderlines experiencing chronic dysphoria (anxiety, rage, depression, and despair) along with dissociation (unreality, deja vu) will do almost anything to keep additional dysphoria away. If this fits you, proper treatment eliminating most if not all of these symptoms can take away the main reason you lie - giving you the choice about how you wish to live your life.
If you're motivated and properly treated you have a chance to have a far better life. People don't trust friends who lie to them.
While waiting for proper medical treatment I can emphatically recommend you get Zig Ziglar's tape series "How to Stay Motivated" and listen as often as possible. 1-800-527-0306