QUESTION:
Dear Dr. Heller,
I'm not sure how to ask this exactly or even if I'll ever get an answer back, but here goes. I am a liar - completely over the top, telling outrageous stories to people. I feel terrible about it every single time I do it. I have built my life up and then watched it be destroyed a few times all because, for some reason, I start to lie.
I wonder if I'm just stupid, but I know I am fairly bright. To keep track of all the things I say at times I have to at least have one heck of a memory. It has cost me in two divorces and a lot of friends at various points in my life. I am to the point I am tired of even trying because I just don't seem to be able to control it at all. I know deep down I don't have to do it - but I end up doing it.
It starts with little things. I just feel like the truth about me is not good enough I suppose. So I invent what I want to say. It escalates and always ends up in me starting all over again. I am not happy like this and I want help. I have looked all over the place trying to find what I need to do to help myself. This email address was the closet thing I could find.
I have been in drug rehab twice in my life. I am not using now (can believe me on that) and not even drinking at all. But I still lie to people. I am past trying to analyze it all and over-complicate everything. I just want to have a normal life and be happy for the first time in my life. I don't even think at times that I think the same way about things as normal people do honestly.
I was classified as Bipolar once and took Paxil. It didn't help me with this though and I wasn't really that depressed over anything except myself and wondering why I lie.
Can you tell me please what to do?
ANSWER:
1) Do the
screening test
and get all the
diagnoses comprehensively treated - especially ADHD and GAD.
2) Get Zig Ziglar's "How to Stay Motivated Package" tape
series and listen constantly. It can be ordered at 800-527-0306
3) Look at this website:
www.NoDeception.com
4) Read spiritually oriented books such as "Your Sacred Self"
and "You'll See it When You Believe it" by Wayne Dyer.
