Is There A Connection Between BPD And Abusive Partners?

    QUESTION:

    Dear Dr. Heller,

    Hi, I wanted to know if there is a connection with those who have BPD and are married to abusive partners.  I have BPD and seem to have the pattern of marrying men who are abusive.  Currently, I am married to a very abusive man and cannot seem to break free.  I do not trust myself with decisions, and I don’t know if it is because of my BPD or just a factor of the abuse I have suffered.  Let me know if you have found this to be true.

     

    ANSWER:

    It is indeed common.  There are many reasons such as tolerating the level of anger, feeling profoundly relieved when a spell is over (which can stop a dysphoric spell), self-hate, etc.

Separator (Biological Unhappiness)

 

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